Happy… uh… Nigerian Independence Day… Yeah.

-So today is Nigerian Independence Day, and all of the locals are, as usual, going to loose their collective minds in celebration of 50 years off the British teat. Thing is one of my co-workers and I were discussing the “liberation” of this country, and we came to the conclusion that it probably wasn’t much of a revolution per se, but probably more of a hands in the air kind of thing.

British Oppressor / Colonist – “Right, about your country…”

Nigerian National – “FREE MY PEOPLE, WHITE INVADER DEMON!!!”

British Oppressor / Colonist “Just calm down mate, we are going to get to that. Now we do all know that there are some pretty serious natural resources here…”

Nigerian National “We know your type!!! We will not allow you to rape the lands of our forefathers!!!”

British Oppressor / Colonist“That is exactly the point that we were about to make my good fellow. The thing is… we are just going to let you have it. Yep, the whole kit and kaboodle is yours. No clauses or strings attached, this shithole I MEAN lovely land is now no longer a colony, but a land of the people. Enjoy.”

Nigerian National “WE WILL FIGHT YOUR VILE OCCUPATION… Wait a second. You are just going to GIVE us our lands back?”

British Oppressor / Colonist“Correct. You guys can just have it. I mean give us a couple of days to pack our things, but after that this land is once again yours. Enjoy.”

Nigerian National “Well then. Alright. Ahem.”

I think you guys get the point.

Happy Independence from Nigeria Day Great Britain.

I think you guys got the best end of the deal.

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About Old Iron
I'm just a guy that works overseas alot and likes to play just as hard as I work. Been to a FEW countries, know a shitload of people all over, and generally have a good time wherever I go. -Oh, and I am currently in between girlfriends, and strangely enough and perfectly happy with that status. In the long run hookers are cheaper. Take my word on that.

4 Responses to Happy… uh… Nigerian Independence Day… Yeah.

  1. ~KC~ says:

    No doubt, fun times will be had in Nigeria tonight…
    I expect to see pictures!

  2. Old Iron says:

    I would show them to you if I had left my room, but massive amounts of sleep were required and I feel like a million bucks because of it. Sorry about that…

  3. Buck says:

    I’m thinkin’ the Brits got the best end of colonial divestiture in ALL cases, with one NOTABLE exception that happened about 234 years ago. 😉

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