Weekend Wonders

… perhaps the men out in blogosphere can explain/clarify something to me:

Is there some strange, unwritten rule that says: holding a girls hand in public isn’t cool?  What is it that says, I’ll be lovey dovey in private with you but in public, we can’t be letting on that we’re ‘together’ … ugh.   What’s up with that… there are more of you out there than not.  Can someone explain this stupid ass rule to me so that I can get it right, once and for all… because its driving me mad.  If you like the girl/woman, dating and ya know she likes holding hands while walking about … what’s the issue?  Is there something I’m not getting? This double standard is rather off-putting and very much a turn-off… and feels rather degrading, as though one is ashamed to be seen in public with me.  While I’m not asking to grasp hands all the time, I don’t get this … I like you in private but not in public… that translates in my head with such an act.  Am I wrongly interpreting this?  Explain.  Please?!

Well… anyhow… as my mind wonders about these moments of utter disgust and shame… I came across this jazzy diddlee /remake of the original “Making Plans for Nigel” ~ XTC … that I actually enjoyed and put a smile on my face… while practicing a little retail therapy in light of such incidents.


About ~KC~
Strong but open minded, opinionated, sensitive, vivacious, outgoing, caring, compassionate, spiritual, habitual, mutable, at times controversial, sometimes superficial, perceived as egotistical and knowledgeable but mostly loveable... all things Sagittarius.

19 Responses to Weekend Wonders

  1. Cdn_Relic says:

    this holding hands issue goes both ways, hun,,, as you know, I am one of those guys that DOES holds hands with my girl in public, no qualms about it, but I have gone out with girls that did exactly the same thing you say some guys do, would NOT hold hands in public, and the conclusion I came to??? same as your’s! I felt that they were embarrassed or ashamed to be seem as “with” me,, no matter what the excuses were, it always felt the same, public rejection, so don’t feel alone in that department, you’re not alone

  2. When you’re driving rather than “herding,” you need that hand back to change the gears. Women love their automatics, but some cars work a whole different way.

    Seriously, though. There are a lot of women out there who like to put their mark on a guy, much like a male dog marking his turf with his urine. And some of these gals have an unfortunate interest in synchronizing the lifestyles through subtraction rather than addition. They will become as one, not because she will learn to ski, but because he will be yanked down onto the couch to watch teevee with her.

    I’m not saying you’re like that; my intuition says you’re quite far from it. But I can tell you that when a gentleman is in his twenties, this is an intense fear he has. Perhaps we need more time for that “getting to know you” stage than we’re willing to admit to anyone, including ourselves.

    • ~KC~ says:

      Twenties… I had less problems with this issue than I do have with men in my 30s. It’s like men have degressed emotionally. I get the whole holding hands and ‘possessiveness’ thing – something that I abhor but at times, I see how it happens. I also see the whole practicality of I need both hands to drive so I don’t kill us both just to make you feel {insert whatever it is you want}.

      Its the double standard, hypocritical aspect of it that I don’t get. In private, they want to tear your clothes off and that can’t happen soon enough. In public… something as simple as holding hands is a no-go. This is the part that confuses the hell outta me.

  3. Just a Feisty Girl says:

    So… I’m new to this tandem blogging thing… but I presume KC wrote this entry? 😉 It has been my experience that any man who is truly into his ‘woman’ will most certainly hold her hand – because he wants to. I would take that a sign, personally — deadwood – next! 😉

    • KC says:

      Hi hon… welcome to our blog! To help you out a bit…
      We have three categories:
      She Said – KC post
      He Said – Old Iron post
      We Said – Joint posting

      Oh trust me… I take it all as a sign and at times, somewhat personally.

    • Old Iron says:

      Yep, that would be the one with the girly bits that wrote this one. Good to have you visiting our little corner of the intertubes; feel free to look around and tell us what you think.

  4. Andy says:

    As the title of the movie said – He’s just not that into you. If he really dug you, he would hold your hand. Assuming that’s all there is to it. Anyone asking for too much PDA is insecure about his or her own feelings, or is in denial about the real strength of the relationship, and should start being honest about that.

    That being said, no man – no REAL man – is particularly comfortable with a clingy bunch of PDA, no matter how solid the bond.

    • ~KC~ says:

      No worries about that… that is exactly how I interpreted the situation as he’s just not into me in PUBLIC. In private – its a whole different movie/story.
      Strange creatures you are.
      Holding hands while walking about – isn’t too much PDA – not in my books.
      I’m not talking about anything over the top other than … holding hands (insert, DA DA DA DUM!!!)…

      Oh well… NEXT!

  5. Buck says:

    I never had an issue with holding hands. Still don’t. Generalities often fail. 😀

    • Old Iron says:

      I have to take a mid-point between Buck’s and Andy’s stance; I have no problem with PDA, but there are appropriate times and places for it, as well as amounts. Not like there are any published rules for this per se, but when I am at a business function I don’t want to have insisted on me a kiss every five minutes.

      -I speak of this from experience.

      • ~KC~ says:

        …but when I am at a business function I don’t want to have insisted on me a kiss every five minutes.

        Definitely NOT my style… and no where near my issue of just holding hands while walking about somewhere in public.

  6. Just a Feisty Girl says:

    Okay, thanks for the clarification – “she said” = girl bits. “He said” = boy bits. Got it. heh heh

  7. Just a Feisty Girl says:

    Do you have a RSS feed to subscribe on here? I can’t find it. 😦

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